the Movie Club Annals ...
Reviewed by Lily W.
C all me
Baby Lily. Some years ago - never mind how long precisely - having
little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on
shore ... wait a minute ... wait a minute ... I just woke up from
my nap, and I'm a little disoriented. Let me start again ...
What a day! The excitement in the air was just too much! I couldn't believe I was actually on the way to my very first Movie Club. The hype surrounding Tomb Raider was big-time, and I just couldn't wait to see it. I'll just bypass all the details about my morning feeding and diaper change and get right to it.
grown-up in the movie had huge lips. My eyesight isn't even fully
developed yet, but those lips jumped right out at me. I think they were
fake. And even though I don't have a full grasp on the laws of physics
yet, I do know the definition of "impossible". Impossible -
like doing a wheelie on the front wheel of a motorcycle on the inside a
mansion while machine gun fire is flying past one's non-helmeted cranium
at the speed of light. The chick with the big lips was doing this,
in case you missed it.
It could be my imagination, but when Big Lips was hanging from her ceiling by a cord doing her nightly indoor mansion-gymnastics, I saw through the glass roof that it was sunny and bright outside. Yet, when the bad guys were outside getting ready to break into the house it was dark, pouring rain, with thunder and lightning all over the place. Actually, it wasn't my imagination. I'd bet my 3:00 P.M. nap on it. You know, I have a swing too, but it's not quite as sophisticated as the one Big Lips uses, and I'm not allowed to use it inside the mansion yet.
back to impossibilities, how is that Big Lips, who weighs all of 98
pounds soaking wet - was able to jump on a 6-ton log and change its
trajectory enough to get it to break the secret piece of glass that
ultimately released the first time-triangle? Can't be done, I'm
telling 'ya. And as Margaret mentioned, why couldn't they just
break the secret piece of glass with a hammer or something?
And why didn't the ancient guys who hid the separate halves of the time triangles on opposite ends of the earth just destroy them in the first place and be done with it? That's what Big Lips did.
Oh well, I had a blast. It's hard to pick my favorite part of the day. Staring at Paul was pretty cool. Sleeping on Great Grandma Nancy was cool too. Sitting next to Grandma in the car is always a pleasure, and hanging out with my parents is always on my A-List. And that look on Ginny's face after Tomb Raider was over should be bottled and sold!
Maybe the best part was when Grandpie swore at the car who passed him too fast on the way home. I pretended I didn't hear it, but later I told him I wouldn't rat him out if he slid me an occasional sawbuck and bought me a Ferrari when I turned 16. I don't know why, but he caved in in less than a nanosecond! I love Movie Club!
Peace out, yo!